Turkey Day

So Thanksgiving has come and gone along with what once was a golden tan, and it will be in the 20's tomorrow at it's highest. The holiday season is in full swing and shoppers are going mad. I went to ran errands yesterday, at some stores that I wouldn't even consider Christmas stores, and got blocked by slow people, almost hit with carts, and frustrated with the crowds. Is it possible to buy enough groceries/cleaning supplies/ toiletries to last me now through january???

I know I'm getting old because the family aspect of this season is more and more important to me. Even though at the same time they are getting more frustrating to me. It's wierd that family can put you in a certain mood with the most subtle push of a button. Miss them when they're not around; think about attacking them with a butter knife when they are. Aaaahhhh.....

I know I'm getting old because people saying "Happy Turkey Day!" bugs me. Uggghhh - I hate myself! I'm just like the bitchy french teacher I had growing up who would freak out when people called Queen Victoria, "Firecracker Day" because we were forgetting all about the roots of the day and not honoring the great monarchy that is Canada and Great Britain!!! Yup! That's me...Sure, I don't even really know the history of Thanksgiving, but I like the idea of a day dedicated to being happy about all the good things in life. I mean, then why not call Christmas "Consumermas" or something more clever but gross?

I know I'm getting old because I'm enjoying cooking more and more. Since my mom wasn't feeling well this year I got to make almost everything for dinner. And it was fun and things actually worked. I am capable of following recipes! Who knew?

But overall the holiday and weekend were great! One TG with the family, one with the friends. Lots of time spent with a great bf. A birthday brunch with fun girfriends and a hockey game. And lastly a pure day of laziness before I had to head back to work - which wasn't easy. Now I'm here, thinking about the weekend already.

Is it here yet?

Jesus Saves

Wednesday night I volunteered at the rescue mission serving food to the homeless and those in rehab. It's something I always think about doing around the holiday season, but the last two year's spots have filled up too fast for my lack of initiative. But I got a spot this year, and I had no idea what to expect.

First impression walking up to the building...I totally wore the wrong thing. I was wearing my clothes from the concert I saw the night before - and while nothing was skin tight, everything felt too formfitting walking by about 50 homeless men lined up on the street. I wanted to shrivel up into myself and disappear; word to the wise - wear baggy clothes. I felt even more nervous when I got the "don't give out any personal information like your name, where you're from, where you're staying, where you went to school" speech. Ugghhhh...

Then I learned more. All of the people who stay there are part of a rehab program in which they can be for up to two years. They live there and work there. I end up working in the kitchen prepping trays of food to be served - and I'm working with two men in the program. They are nice and friendly - they have classes on relationships and how to talk to people. We served 250 hot meals of turkey, stuffing, mashed topatoes, gravy, veggies, salad and bananas! This was no prison food, it looked yummy!

I am so impressed by people who get addicted, hit rock bottom and then actually have the nads to get their poop in a group, join a program, and get clean. I don't know the strength that must take. My lawyer brother says 75% of those that get clean don't stay clean but I don't care. I am so impressed by the 25%. I have never been addicted but even without that, I am such a glutton and hedonist - that if I had the addiction gene I'd be totally effed.

The first round of people being served is staying there and in the program. The second round is people from surrounding shelters and chapels. And lastly they open the doors to anyone left outside: those living on the streets. Why are 95% of homeless people men? Any ideas?

I spend a lot of the time serving, wondering what everyone thinks of me. Wondering how they feel about the little blond girl from the suburbs who decides to volunteer for something a couple of times a year so she can feel all righteous about the world. And then as I'm leaving with the other three volunteers at 9pm at the end of the dinner, I hear a couple of shouts "thank you ladies, we really appreciated it!"

"You're welcome!"

I love this time of year - which is a new thing for me. Christmas and all that goes with were resurrected for me last year by the ex. Before him I had never had a boyfriend that got into holidays, any holidays - unless you count Superbowl Sunday. But he was just so excited about them that I guess it became contageous. We had a tree together = (

I love excuses for my family and loved ones to get together. The consumerism aspects of it aside I will always enjoy Thanksgiving through Christmas from now on! And if I have children I will spoile them rotten so they always have fond memories.

So this year I'm going to cook too much food and eat massive amounts of turkey drenched in gravy!

I'm going to decorate my place!

I'm going to hopefully find the perfect thing for everyone I care about without having to go to the stupid mall or feeling like a dirty consumer!

I'm going to listen to cheesy holiday music!

I'm going to take time off on random days! And I'm going to sleep in!

I'm going to drink too much wine and Bailey's! And I'm gonig to try to get my friends to do the same!

I'm going to wear big warm socks!

I'm going to be cheesy and wrap presents for my dog and put them under the Christmas tree with the rest of the stuff! And then I'm going to watch him rip into them!

I'm going to make a cheesy list of stuff I'm thankful for!

I'm going to make new years resolutions! I'm going to resolve to cut down on cussing like I do every year and fail again!

I'm going to have eater's remorse!

I'm going to try to make home made egg nog!

I'm going to complain about carp and annoy my dad like I do every year!

I'm going to hope for a white christmas!

I'm going to put lights outside on my tiny porch!

When is Big, too Big?

In the last hour of work, huddled behind the hiding wall in the cafeteria, a Carrie in my life confesses to me with a guilty face and sad eyes that she let her Big back in her life and that he screwed her over yet again. "When did this happen?" and I realize it's been too long since I really talked to my beautiful friend. And I wish I had been there for her...again.

What makes women do this; otherwise rational, intelligent, and strong women? Sometimes even men. I've known male Carries - Aidens. What makes anyone do this. I think back to about half a year ago, when I answered the phone to a drunk, uncontrollably sobbing Carrie, drunk early on a saturday afternoon. After a month of staying away, she met him for morning cocktails. All moving-on progress, down the drain. I spend an hour on the phone with her, convinced I didn't say anything worthwile, but happy that she seemed greatful and "helped" anyway. I remember thinking, holy fuck, I hope I'm never there again. I've had a Big, I've had two Bigs and I'm over it. I don't need to feel that again. Ya, ya, it takes bad times to appreciate the good times, but I've had enough. I remember like it was yesterday: long days of feeling dead inside, long nights of restless sleep, and thinking that you will never feel okay again.

"I can't talk to anyone about it. You're the only person I can talk to. **** won't let me talk anymore - she says I'm stupid".

"OMG, I say, this is sooooooo like when Carrie had to sneak from her friends to see Big again" and I laugh. Happy that I get a laugh out of her too.

"ya! And then she told Samantha" but I'm no Samantha. "I'm stupid right? Please tell me I'm stupid! I'm not learning, I don't think I'm ever going to learn!"

No, you're not stupid. And I'm not judging. I know what it feels like. When someone will never give you exactly what you need, but just enough to keep you hopeful. Or they'll give you what you need, but only some of the time, leaving you hungry the rest. Or they'll give you what you need, but they'll also give the same thing to someone else at the same time. Whatever the method of gut wrenching torture, no, you're not stupid.

And then I gave her, what might be the worst or best advice I've ever given anyone. "Who cares? Don't learn. If it feels good, keep doing it. If it's worth it, keep doing it. If when it's good it outweighs when it's bad, then who cares what people think?" I don't know if I believe it as it's coming out of my mouth, but maybe there's some truth to it.

I don't ever want to be there again, but that's a personal choice. And I know I've been a fool for lesser things - haven't you? So why not?

Top 10 Shows I Miss...

Wonder Years – Yes, even though I know where the nickname Scrote comes from now. And even though I don’t understand boys’ obsession with frigid Winnie Cooper – who looked a little like she got hit in the face with something flat.

My So Called Life – Because high school really was a war zone that you dreaded going to every day, and the Jordan Catalano’s of the world made out of it alive while others didn’t. And because Brian is so sweet. And because “You’re so beautiful, it hurts to look at you”

Beverly Hills 90210 – Because it’s the total opposite of MSCL: completely unrealistic and unidentifiable to most of us. Let’s see – Kelly went through how many deaths, drug addictions, boyfriends (I think she went through every one in the crew at some point), eating disorders….blah blah blah. At one point I lived with 4 girls, and FX played these 4 times a day – I have seen the whole run of the show at least three times and could still space out to it.

Unsolved Mysteries – Did any of you stay up on a Friday night, turn the lights off, get a snack and watch this show by yourself? Geeze – was that guy’s voice ever creepy???!!!!

Melrose Place – Just because of the drama.

OJ Simpson Trial – Ok, it wasn’t a show, but it was on for a while and now it’s not. And now there is a stupid book out that might as well be confession. I love America, but I was embarrassed for the justice system, and now there are lemons, limes and jalapeños being rubbed into that wound. But none the less, it was fascinating, the way that you can’t stop looking at a car accident as you drive by….cringing yet interested. And he’s sitting back, and laughing at it all. Also, throw in the JonBenet saga – which isn’t over yet, much to my chagrin.

Beavis and Butthead – I know you can get it on DVD or whatever, but it really isn’t the same without the original music videos. And were does morning wood come from anyway? They never found out!

Fraggle Rock – This is one that I miss, but wouldn’t want to revisit. It just wouldn’t be the same and it would probably end up being a spoiled memory. I’d rather keep the Doozers and the Gorgs as a fond memory.

Pop Up Video – I miss music videos in general. And not the same 3 videos over and over again between 7-7:15am. Really, there are other artists than Fergie and Christina out there. Anyway, ya, on that show I discovered many magical secrets, like the genius behind the Jamiroquai video! Priceless.

Animaniacs – I think Pinky and the Brain were my favorite. What was yours? I’ve tried to DL them these days, but it always comes through in German. Wtf? Figures the darn Germans would like that!

You Make Me So Sick I Want to Vomit All Over You!

I know I've already blogged today! But I had to share my full disgust with the advertising and corporate world!!!!! How dare you? How dare you use blog comments as an advertising tool. Stop sending texts to my phone. Stop all the junk mail. Stop the spam. Stop calling my parent's house.

This is too much. I hate you I hate you I hate you!

How do you live with yourself?

I don't know what's worse!

Is it the fact that I actually got excited that I had a fan that didn't know me and that fame and fortune and a great book deal were just around the corner?

Or is it the fact that the thing being advertised in this scammy way is also a scam. One of those heinus programs where they ask for $30 so they can send you some make money from home pamphlet and when you do it's a stupid pyramid scheme letter.

This is so evil. You know who sends in for those? People who don't have the money to lose. Single moms? Less educated and fortunate people? Unemployed people who are starting to hit rock bottom and getting desperate?

I hate you - and I'll be laughing when I know you've become Satan's personal blow up doll in the fiery pits of hell!

Full Weekend Recap!

Another weekend is over and Monday is in full swing. It’s a sad time. The weekend was great and I wish it were Friday again! On Friday, Gus took me out to dinner and a movie. The sushi was great and Borat is one of the funniest movies of all time. He brought sunflowers – I love sunflowers! He also bought Khakis for dinner because he couldn’t find any others. Can you get any cuter? Seriously though, clean up your closet = )

I had to realize that my life was getting a little too 90210 for my taste. On Friday night while I was on this date, my ex was hanging out with another guy I’ve hooked up with that he’s recently randomly started talking to. Ick. Furthermore, he told me he wants to ask a girl at work out that I know and have spent time with (but he did not know this). I’m fine with this really, and sadly I don’t even have anything catty to say to her and I’m GREAT at catty. I even gave him the advice for the perfect nondate date that he was totally stressing about. I mean really, it was perfect. I am the world’s best ex girlfriend. I am Joe Motherfucking Wingman.

Saturday was a girls’ night out and tons of fun. Although the establishment left much to be desired – there was pool, and drinking and shameless man picking up on. I’m soooo glad I’m not single. The group consisted of me, a friend from Volleyball, a goofy punky girl, a hot pregnant single girl (L) and the ever elusive hot lesbian couple. Yes, guys, they really exist. And one of them was pregnant, which makes so many questions fly around in my head that it wants to explode! But I didn’t get drunk and make an ass of myself by asking any of them. Go me!

Step 1 – Set up camp at the pool table across the hall from cute guys.
Step 2 – Point, giggle, and talk behind your hand like high school girls.
Step 3 – Stare, looking for wedding bands. Notice only one out of six.
Step 4 – Notice them noticing what you’re doing.
Step 5 – Stop acting like that (oh, no, that’s what I WISH they would have done but didn’t)
Step 6 – Have the waitress bring them a pitcher because “we hear guys like beer”
Step 7 – Try not to act too disappointed that they didn’t come over to thank you
Step 8 – Graciously accept the 5 shots they send over!!! Woohooo!
Step 9 – Close out pool table tab and awkwardly invite them to play shuffle bored.
Step 10 – Realize that Shuffle Bored is the most boring fucking game ever invented and you’re not supposed to be playing it……..yet
Step 11 – Go back to playing pool send girls over for contact.

Yes, it was shameless. Except for my shame. When they guys finally came over to talk to us, awkward glances, bad conversation, and numbers were exchanged. I learned from the one wedding banded man that some men make lists of types of meat they want to try before they decide on a cow they want to buy. Yes, a physical bullet pointed list. This reminds me why some girls are lesbians.

I also learned that pregnant women still get hit on by guys. As the hot single woman was hit on by a tall, dark, handsome gentleman who asked me whether he should bring her juice? Or Water? Upon finding out she couldn’t have a real drink….Can you get any cuter?

Overall – a great weekend with one miner exception, that I might go into in a later piece entitled “Worst Moments of My Life…….So Far” – but not today. Happy Monday!

Just a Few Simple Needs...

I am soooooo bored at work with nothing to do. Some other things I want, sinceriously:

A timeshare to the world.

A plane to get me there, or a High Speed Civil Transporter if they exist....the go mach 15!

A house with a secret passage, a ball pit and a hoseable food fight room.

A huge yard with a hot tub, dog playground, cherry trees, brook, water slide, and one huge Weeping willow named Bob.

A tomb that would put the Taj Mahal to shame.

A signed in blood confession to the JonBenet Ramsey murder, because I'm still obsessed with it and always will be. Liar! Murderer!

An Iron Maiden, because they look cool and creep people out.

A vineyard specializing in Sauv. Blanc, where we still stomp grapes by foot. I've always wanted to do that!

Some kind of big party boat with a built in submarine (for my friends and family, I'm way too claustrophobic), and a shark cage for when I get bored with life.

A huge Buddha collection made out of solid green and blue amethyst.

A sushi restaurant next door to my house.

A tent with a solar battery powered heater.

An elephant or dolphin family that accepts me as one of their own. No wait - both.

A movie library with all my favorite romantic comedies/movies - Groundhog Day, Pride and Prejudice, Little Women, When Harry Met Sally.......Oh ya, and My So Called Life. "You're so beautiful, it hurts to look at you".

A heated massage table.

A pearl that I found in the ocean.

A lie detector. Mostly to mess with people, but also to test Bishop's Babysitters. However, if I have my own plane, he might never need them again!


A real Edvard Munch painting – the Madonna please.

A soup kitchen for the homeless. With the best tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches and NesQuick hot chocolate.

A liger.

People who are forced to play Volleyball or soccer with me at my whim. And I have many
whims!

A confession booth so that I can play dirty priest and innocent school girl. But not by myself.

A detailed and accurate map to the fountain of youth.

On a related note - an unlimited supply of livers.

A limo with a driver named Chief. So I can say, "Take us to Hollywood, Chief" just because
it sounds fun. Or maybe Spanky. Someone needs to be named Spanky!

Fresca from my tap.

A juke box that does NOT HAVE any Black Crowes on it, or Sweet Home Alabama. Does every bar have to have those?

Salma Hayek's body and Portia de Rossi's hair (when she was on Ally)

On a related note, a lifetime supply of sports bras.

A painting studio complete with the best stereo system in the world that makes Maria Callas sound like more of an angel than she already is.

A dance studio with private instructors.

A GIANT Martini glass filled with champagne so that when I perfect the art of burlesque dancing I can put Dita Von Teese to shame.

Scotch.

A library of all the books that I'll ever want to read. Even the ones that haven't been written yet.

Three beds: a water bed, a sand bed, and some awesome space age material bed. Plus the one I currently own.

A piece of each planet in our Solar System, Pluto included. That's such BS!

So if my last post wasn't too much to ask....I'm sure this is.

l-o-v-e

Six failed long term (yes, over one year) relationships, and I'm 27, and I'm told I don't know what I want?
I know I want love. I know some things about love...for me.

They say your first one is always the best and will never feel the same. How depressing is that? Why bother going on living if the rest of your life will be a quiet sad struggle to achieve some previous high? What they should really say is that you never love the same way twice. And hopefully each time you will love smarter.

I know that love should never make you feel fat, but maybe a bit inadequate. If the person you're with doesn't inspire you to want to be a better person in any way, then you don't care enough and you should do them a favor and leave them alone. Some one else will feel the awe towards them that they deserve.

Love should be full of little things. If it is, then the big ones will take care of themselves.

Love should be both predictable and surprising. Predictable on the big issues, surprising on the little ones. If the big ones aren't eye to eye, then you don't even know each other.

Love should never make you feel desperate. Despair and passion are not the same thing. It is possible (I did not know this for the longest time) to be passionate without the fear that something going to snatch your happiness away at any moment. If you can't ask the other person "what's up?" then you're not close enough, or too scared of the answer.

Love should be full of new memories. You can't build a story with a happy ending out of nothing.

Love should be inspirational. He can't fall on the gravel driveway weeping when you say you're leaving for good, but not be able to quit smoking so that he can be around for you when you're old and need him most. Then he doesn't love you, you're just another cigarette.

Love should be stretch mark free. If something isn't perfect about your body, love will pretend not to notice even if it does, because everything else is so much more important.

Love shouldn't approach moral decisions with a "what can I get away with?" attitude. It should approach them with "what is best for us" attitude, "what can I do to make this awesome person's life better today?".

Love should make things feel easier. Like getting up in the morning, going to work, going to the gym, and smiling.

Love should want to be with you and hold your hand. It doesn't want to go to Vegas alone because "that would be more fun".

Love is NOT never having to say you're sorry. When things are so close and so deep to the heart, sometimes you can't need to hear, or say sorry, more.

Love should get better as time goes on. Maybe the initial excitement goes away, but the memory of it and devotion built should carry it on to more powerful feelings.

Love shouldn't care about spilled wine, wrinkles, or dirt on the dashboard.

Love should feel a bit like falling. Even if it's the startling type of falling that wakes you up in the middle of the night to try to find out if you're alive. Because the term wasn't coined by foreigners who don't know what the "f-alling" word is and there should be no stoppers.

Even if you think that what you need is written in Braille on your tender parts, if love doesn't have soft enough fingers to find out what it is at the beginning then he never will.

Real love feels like the porch light is always on.

Six failed relationships? At least I have learned what I learned. And I know what I want, the package it will come in is less clear.

No on 43, Yes on I

It’s voting time! This is my first chance to ever vote! Yay me!

Too bad I don’t know any of the candidates involved. There’s really only one issue that I care about anyway - Gay marriage. Since we like to stir the pot at the parents’ house, conversation wandered there over the weekend. My dad is totally against it with no good reason that I can see. I don’t understand what straight people are so afraid of anyway.

Marriage is already a damaged institution. Conservative ads argue that Gay marriage will dilute the meaning of marriage. I don’t think anything dilutes it more than the term “irreconcilable differences” which should really just be changed to, “I changed my mind”.

I don’t think children adopted by gay parents have any less chance of being happy. Everyone’s messed up any way in one way or another and having gay parents isn’t going to make you gay. And even if it did, so what? Having morbidly obese parents will probably make you obese as well, but no one’s stopping that!

By the way, I think “Waiting For the World to Change” is a horrible song in that it is full of excuses and serves as an anthem to passivism for our already lazy generation. Really, it’s just saying we’re unhappy about some things, but we really don’t care enough to do anything about it – and that’s sad. I mean, the fight ain’t fair? The fight is never fair. It certainly wasn’t fair for Rosa Parks or MLK, or Anne Frank, or Gandhi. We’re just too lazy to walk to work!

“You must become the change you want to see in the world”.

uptown girl

Ok, another sunday morning. It turns out I have a lot of issues that I didn't know about - or it's just that time of life when i'll stress out about everything. Is this my quarter life crisis? Perchance.........

I wasn't raised to care about other people. I wasn't raised to do good deeds for no reason. And yet I have always thought I've been raised well. How can this be? Thank you to every boyfriend or friend that has made me want to be a better person without making me feel like an @sshole for not being one already.

So my parents never went to a soccer game, or choir performance. They weren't out of town, or busy, they just didn't think it was important. But it was. When I lived in Eugene 8 of my closes friends came to my choir performance and almost I cried. Last night I watched "Uptown Girls" and it meant too much.

When I graduated from college, the only person that came was my ex bf (and he was an ex at the time) that flew in from San Fran. My parents lived less than an hour away. My dad was out of town. My mom didn't come because she "doesn't like driving on the highway".
I guess it's not a big deal and I shouldn't still be worrying about it. But I guess I never realized that it bugged me before. I'm going to hang out with my brothers today. No one went to their football games either. I wasn't raised to do that.

Sooooo.....I'm hungover, both my feet are somehow injured (don't reacall andy incidences) and i'm drinking a beer and watching a cop out my window. I feel like a bad person. I could be giving blood/plasma some where...volunteering in a soup kitchen....but instead I'm doing this.

If I was a SATC character which one would I be? I'm not sure.....Probably a mix of Charolette and Carrie. Probably more Carrie. I'm a hopeless romantic, but not nearly as goal driven "must get married", keep your "eyes on the Prize" as Charolette. And I'd never give up a night of partying for a s3x toy. While what Carrie did to Aidan, while he was redoing her floors is towards the very bottom of the gradient that makes you a good person in life...I do know where she was coming from. Bad Bad girl :(

One favorite quote from the show: "A sex toy doesn't bring you flowers or go home to meet your parents" which I've changed to "A sex toy doesn't bring you flowers and hold your hair back when you puke". But then again.....a sex toy doesn't knock you up so u puke from morning sickness, and otherwise you're just puking from random collegestyle fun, and who remembers who hold your hair THEN anyway?

Oldie But Goodie

After a careful analysis of Heart's gem "All I Want to do is Make Love to You" (and I've included some comments in brackets, feel free to add your own) I still don't know the answer to the most perplexing question of the 80's. Is the one thing the new guy can't give her the "bringing out the woman in her", or "walking in a garden and planting a seed"?
Please advise.

It was a rainy night
When he came into sight
Standing by the road
With no umbrella
No coat (asking for money for gin)
So I pulled up along side
And I offered him a ride (I bet you did!)
He accepted with a smile (how many teeth?)
So we drove for a while
I didn't ask him his name (later I found out from Legends of the Fall credits)
This lonely boy
In the rain
Fate tell me it's right, is this love at first sight (it doesn’t take much for this chick)
Please don't make it wrong
Just stay for the night

All I wanna do is make love to you
Say you will
You want me too
All I wanna do is make love to you
I got lovin' arms, to hold on to

So we found this hotel
It was a place, I knew well (How do u know this hotel so well? Cumdumpster!)
We made magic that night
Oh he did everything right
He brought the woman out of me
So many times
Easily
And in the morning when he woke
All I left him was a note
I told him I am the flower
You are the seed (did she feel conception or something?)
We walked in the garden (dirty hotel sex)
We planed a tree (must have)
Don't try to find me (ya, guys always try to hunt down one night stands – so they can propose and all that shit)
Please don't you dare (but please pay for the room service/porn bill)
Just live in my memory
You'll always be there (with …….ugh, I don’t know their names!)

All I wanna do is make love to you
One night of love
Was all we knew
All I wanna do is make love to you
I got lovin' arms, to hold on to - oh
Oooh we made love
Love like strangers (how do STRANGERS, make LOVE? And don’t say doggy style)
All night long
We made love

Then it happened one day
We came round the same way
You can imagine his surprise
When he saw his own eyes (omg, who saw this coming??!)
I said please please understand
I'm in love with another man (this one took 2 days)
And what he couldn't give me, oh
Was the one little thing that you can

All I wanna do is make love to you
One night of love
Was all we knew
All I want to do is make love to you
C'mon say you will
You want me too
All I wanna do is make love to you
One night of love
Was all we knew
All I wanna do is make love to you
Say you will baby
Want me too all night long
All night long
All night long
All night long
All I wanna do, all I wanna do, all I wanna do, all I wanna do
All I wanna do is make love to you
One night of love
Was all we knew - yeah
He brought the woman out of me
So many times
Easily
Oooh we made love
Love like strangers (LOL)

Who Killed Chivalry?

Earlier this week, I got a taste of the death of chivalry. It bugged me a little, but what bugged me more was and is my own hypocrisy. I expect chivalry but not sexism. This sparked a discussion with a good (great) friend of mine who thinks there is nothing wrong with this. But I submit that he is just too nice to either tell me the truth.....or too nice to get pissed off about women doing this. I mean, I'm pretty much saying that women and men should get the same treatment, except for the things that benefit women.

I believe he said that just because the oppressive norms that created chivalry are gone (which they aren't really in a lot of ways, but that's a whole different Oprah) that doesn't mean that the nice things that came from it should be as well. And who's to blame for this? The feminists. While I can see this and agree....I think the laziness of men is also to blame. I have been around the block enough to make some observations. Now relax guys, this is purely on the aggregate, or mean, median, mode type shiz, so I don't want any snippy comments. Men are generally lazy when it comes to relationships and are usually satisfied with the status quo of things ,aside from wanting more sex or food; and if change is going to take place in the relationship requiring more work of any sort, that change will be initiated by the woman.

So feminism gave men an excuse to be lazier and now they are.

I have always considered myself to be a feminist, but I realize now I am not. While I want equal pay for equal work and equal rights, I realize that men and women are not equal. I don't know how I feel about women in the army.

There are enormous differences between the sexes which I think are obvious, and yet I've been attacked for publicly pointing out that women are physically weaker than men - by "feminists". Really? I'd like to see all sports combined to one gender so that no woman would ever win an Olympic gold medal again (well, maybe in figure skating or something), and then we can fucking talk about it!

And the cognitive differences I can't even begin to describe. I don't get men at all, they're ability to drive really long distances, they're love of video games, drive to work too much and die with the most toys, their ability to objectify sex so much, the importance of sports.......blah blah blah....I could go on and on - regardless I respect the differences and believe that they are there for a reason, and don't want to turn men into poetry reading cucumber sandwich loving pansies.

So equal rights are good - but it is little sad to me that our daughters might grow up in a world where the guy doesn't walk on the road side of the sidewalk on a busy street.