So Pretty.....Had to Take a Pic

Thank you Gus!

Mansogeny

I have recently started listening to Tom Lykes. It’s a very misogynistic show and does a lot for my own healthy sense of mansogyny. I've been listening for two days and have heard the term "fat lazy bitch" way too often.

Even his attempts at accurate advice are ill formed. Take for example, don’t spend any money on impressing girls on a date and don’t go out with a girl for more than three dates without getting some. Reasoning: Women know within 30 seconds of meeting you whether or not you’re fuckable so don't waste the money or effort. This is very true. But just because some one is fuckable, doesn’t mean you’ll immediately fuck them. I for example, try to make it a habit not to fuck anyone I don’t know. You CANNOT get to know someone in three average dates. You can barely get to know some one in a year, but this is why I use the word try. I could pretend to be a virgin but it wouldn’t work.

Wooh! Have to remember there's good ones out there.

Ok, so what really pisses me off about this show is the IQ of women that call in to argue with the unattractive, babbling fool that is TOM. I have a suspicion that the screeners screen out the intelligent women that could possibly hold a flame to his loud, obnoxious and ignorant fart which I wish would light a huge fire and burn his fucking face. Those that do get through cannot formulate a coherent, philosophical argument to save their coochies.

Example? Topic Yesterday: Tom is fed up that women get all kind of breaks in the work place on account of their children like getting flex time, day care provided and “running around all morning while the rest of the chumps sit at their desks working hard” blah, blah, blah…….Do not invest in family friendly corporations and women have it way too easy.

Women phoning in say: “Well don’t you, ummm…. Think that corporations have a social responsibility …..tooo uhhhhh…do that stuff?”

WHY WOMAN? YOU HAVE TO PROVIDE A REASON FOR THAT? WTF?

Tom's response: Corporations have a responsibility to make a profit which they give back to their shareholders. They owe women nothing.

Result: Women look dumb and Tom gets to sit on his king shit of turd mountain throne.

How about, corporations benefit by not paying men enough to support a family on a single income thereby promoting the woman having to go to work and should therefore reciprocate by making this more attainable to couples with children?

How about supporting an educated nation from which they would have a pool of employable workers? Assuming that the formula for determinant of birth rates as discovered in various studies is

Birth Rate = f(population density; education level; per capita income; extent of poverty; unemployment rate; racial composition; family stability)

…it would be safe to assume that the less educated and those who are less likely to have money for an education for their children are more likely to procreate. And then assume (another safe one I think) that those born to this situation are less likely to be educated in the future. With divorce rates climbing in all sections of society, it is a sociological fact that many women will end up single mothers, and without “family friendly” places to work will end up on the poor end of society with children who do not have a good education in store for them, thereby decreasing the total pool of employable workers in the analytical sector of employment. Thus encouraging corporations to support the needs of single women to ensure that the population remains employable.

There’s a fucking coherent argument….and FUCK YOU TOM!

Adam Air - Flight KI-574

It has been 18 days since the Adam Air flight went down in stormy weather and they are now fairly conclusively finding remnants of the flight, like seats with serial numbers, parts of wings, and various objects washing ashore. A body has been found, but has been said not to be from the flight. Where is it from? Info isn't available. They've found pieces of scalp and clothing as well; DNA tests have begun.

The situation is more and more somber each day - and what is left now? Closure? Is a piece of scalp going to give anyone closure? Must we dig around and send pieces of people home in a body bag to their grieving families?

I have no idea - I've never lost anyone so close to me. On the one hand, some things are best remembered happy and carefree like two adventurous daughters on the brink of accomplishing great things in life, rather than pieces of scalp and teeth. On the other hand, I have a pretty healthy sense of denial and may live my whole life otherwise, thinking that it was a mistake and they'll come home any second unless I'm given a sliver of bone to hold on to and weep over.

It would seem, with the exception of religious faith for some reason unknown to me, humans like proof for what they believe. If every person is accounted for by tooth or nail or hair, there is no chance that Stephanie is sitting on an island somewhere shivering, wondering why her mother isn't raising hell to find her. Is this possible right now...yes. Is it probable...no. But how awful would it be if we stopped trying and she's out there? Turns my stomach - but so does sending parts of people back to their families and giving them the further slap in the face they will never forget.

I guess I just hope all the families involved get as much comfort as they can, be it in the closure of sceince, or the mystery of hope and wonder, or the acceptance of that which you cannot change without question.

A collection of pics of Stephanie; I know most of you don't know her, but any contagous smile is worth spreading. = )

http://www.flickr.com/photos/stephaniejackson21/

STEPHANIE, YOU WILL BE MISSED.

Travelling and Sushi

Coming back to this frigid cold has definitely made a little more appreciative of my time in Phoenix (yes, I learned how to spell it). It's not the most beautiful, or exciting, or diverse city, but it was 50 degrees warmer than it was here, which is good enough!

Despite a couple of snags, I had an awesome weekend and ate too much, drank too much and spent too much money. The highlight (other than Gus successfully finishing some crazy ass race) had to be getting into the Mariott at the Buttes in Tempe (a resort built on the side of the mountain) where we spent the afternoon chatting it up and watching the sunset from the mountainside hot tub and sipping on LIT's. The desert is home to some beautiful sunsets, and I'm a such a sucker for palm trees.

I love to travel, and I want to go to so many places. I wish they'd let my dog on planes. I want to go to Australia because the beaches and the mountains and the architecture look so beautiful. Also, because some of my favorite most laid back people I've ever met are from Australia, and everyone that goes to visit says that they are some of the most friendliest people in the world. I also want to go to New Zealand, because hey, it's sooooo green, and if I'm already in Australia...OOoohh and so I can see the toilet swirl the other way!!! And my god the sushi!

I want to go to Hawaii, over and over again, because - have you ever seen it? But this time, I want to do real things, not just sitting on the beach because everyone is busy eating and no one wants to do anything with me. Most of all I want to do the sunrise volcano bike ride - 20km of downhill bike riding from 4am til past sunset, with wine and food and fresh Maui air. And my god, the sushi!

In all fairness I don't need much and would be happy to be anywhere where there is beach, sun, warm weather, and the ones I care about to share it all with. I even like going to the local reservoir, where you can sneak in with the pups and let them run around in the water, while floating around on some sort of floatie toy with some sort of drink in a Nalgene bottle, HEAVILY ICED. If you close your eyes and listen, the soft waves "lapping ashore" almost make you feel like being at the ocean. And afterward, I can always get some sushi!

One of these days I might just grow a pair and open a beachside sushi restaurant in some tropical location, and when I do you're all invited!

Can I help you if you are a Pheonix...

Tomorrow I'm flying to Pheonix tomorrow and I'm pretty excited. I don't know what the heck
I'm going to do in Pheonix, but I do know that I am escaping what might be the coldest
weekend in my state. It won't be warm enought there to use our hotel's outdoor pool, but it
might be warm enough to have a drink on a patio, or go hiking without a face mask.

Gus is running a half marathon there because he's crazy. I try not to say that too him too
much because I think people that run marathons really get off on our lack of understanding
of why...and I just don't want to give him that satisfaction. But I'm really proud of him
anyway. And I'll be waiting for him at check points or something or however that stuff
works - I've never watched one, and I'm not much of a cheerer, so it should be
interesting...I'll try not to hand him a cup of hot coffee. ; )

I might get to meet his religious grandparents - yikes!

Other than that, can't wait til we can drink after the marathon - hellsyeah!
This is our first real trip together with flight and hotel and everything. We've driven to
the mountains for a weekend together, but I feel like flying makes it more of a real trip.
I have heard it said (alright, maybe just read it in Cosmo) that you can tell a lot about
whether or not a relationship will make it based on how a trip together goes.
This makes sense, because you're taken out of your comfort zone, you are put in new
situations, you get to observe your partner in different situations, you learn about their
ability to prepare and think ahead and yaddah, yaddah, yaddah...

I've had many good trips with people with whom relationships didn't last. I've had some
awful vacations with people with whom relationships didn't last.

I've had some one complain on end about the hoops you have to get through to renew your
passport on short notice, the lack of understanding of the ticketing system on the trains in
Amsterdam, the way the weather was in a naturally gloomy European city, make me sob
uncontrollably with his bickering on a bench on a busy tourist street and wish I could fly
home early.

I've had someone carry my bags and skiis unconditionally, try to heroically find deals for
us in Mexico, ebrace the sense of adventure in doing things that are off the beaten path and
without paying for the expensive tours, handle the dirt and mosquitoes and cold of camping
for the first time in his life, and go out of his way to make sure I got what I wanted when
I wanted it when it seemed unlikely, or dare I say impossible.

Travelling is so much better without the drama. If anyone should be freaking out about
anything it should be me for not being able to bring my mascara on the plane, or breaking a
nail picking up my bags, or forgetting to pack my nail file, or worse yet, the one pair of
shoes that ties half of my outfits together, or getting my period in the middle of a flight
and knowing my trip will be rather sexless, or how much I miss my dog...
I'm going to miss you bish!

Stephanie Jackson

A friend of mine from Oregon was on a plane that went down in Indonesia 7 days ago. It doesn't seem real. She was one of the happiest and most adventurous people I've ever met - and always full of positive energy. Her idea of a friday night would be to put on a costume to go climb a mountain, even in the dark with a little flashy key chain light. She was always one to back a friend up and try to cheer someone up.

She was with her sister and father who lives in the area - a total of 102 passengers on board. Her brothers, fortunately were not with her. We didn't keep in touch after I moved, she was after all only 21 and in a much different place in life.

It must be really awful to be on a plane that's going down. I can't imagine what I would be doing, and it breaks my heart but I keep picturing her face realizing what's going on and that she can't do anything about it. Hopefully she did do something about it, this is what a friend wrote about what she's doing now:

Here's what I imagine: a search boat comes across a shore on which 100 people are tied up in slings, their bones properly set and their bleeding fully suppressed. Stephanie is standing there with a sharpened rock, sawing off a vine to use as a rope as she eyes the fruit above and decides on the best way to get it down. Lindsey is nowhere to be found! Where is she, but diving nearby, catching fish with a spear made from a broken wing and an armrest from first class.
A water-distiler (made from the aicraft windshield and some tubing) is working atop a pile of burning seat cushions.

If anyone could do that, it would be Stephanie.

Unfortunately the weather conditions have been horrible there in the days following the crash and the search for the plane couldn't even start until two days later. Now metal detectors are picking up what could be the plane on an ocean floor, 1,050 metres (1,150 yards) under the sea off Mamuju. There is some speculation that the plane actually broke apart in the air, which makes things look even more bleak.

Please keep Stephanie Jackson in your thoughts and send postive energy.

And remember how quickly life can change next time you want to start a fight with some one over the dishes, or leave some one angry, or are too lazy to send an email, or pick up the phone, or send a txt. And smell your roses and deal with your thorns - it's a game she played.

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/traveloutdoors/2003507552_webindonesiacrash03.html

Pandas and Wine

I watched very sentimental mothery shows tonight. Perhaps I was too fatigued to change the channel, perhaps I really wanted to know. The story of Mahjong was on animal planet and they followed the birth closely.
Her baby hit a wall on the way out, while it was squirted out, hit a wall! A cute baby giraffe hits the cold hard ground at 6 feet squirted out with it's lanky long body and it forces it to stand right up. Maybe this difficulty at the very start makes you stronger. It makes me wonder about the warm bath tub trend...and even then, aren't they just postponing the coldness until the baby is out of the warm water? Maybe it's more gradual, but life isn't always gradual.
People you love don't get gradually killed by drunk drivers in a snow storm right before Christmas.
Pandas are said to be mean....whatever. All animals are mean, if you rub them the wrong way...me included.
The other show that was on on TLC was "Paralyzed and Pregnant" and I'm not going to get into that at all...

Pssssttt......

Have you ever stolen vodka from your parents' freezer, and diluted it with water so they couldn't tell and then acted dumb when they wondered how it could possibly freeze?

I lied a lot growing up, I feel like the middle child has to lie the most - not that that's an excuse. But the first child turns out so good, that the second crazy child can't hold up. Ok, I don't know if I really believe that either...but it seems to be a pattern amongst the families I know.

I lied about a lot, all the time, because my life style didn't suit my family at all.

My dad always took it so personally when he caught me. "How could you lie to ME?!" "How could you do this to ME?!" "What am I doing wrong?!" And it made me feel really bad.

But I think, no child can grow up without lying to their parents. It's kind of built in to the system. If parents had it their way, it would be all puppies and rainbows all the time. And then the devil would come wrapped up in a rainbow and you wouldn't know the difference.

You can tell a girl:
He/she's the wrong person for you...
This is the wrong choice for you...
You deserve better thant this or that...
You are so much smarter than this...
If it was meant to be...
Don't you think there's consequences? to...
what are you thinking doing? ...

But you don't learn unless you learn for yourself, by picking the wrong major, the wrong guy, the wrong friend, the wrong vice, the wrong guy, the wrong guy the wrong guy, the wrong guy.....

And even given all that...if I ever have kids, they will have a hard time getting away with stuff. I have done the vodka thing, and many others, and I'll let them know I know. But I'll be waiting to tell them that some one cares about their mistakes, and will be there when their heart is broken, when their blood/alke content level is too high, when they figured out they aren't happy in what they're donig, and when the walls are caving in on them and making them feel like the world is against them.

And I'm sure it will hurt when they lie.

Saddam Bundy

I just watched the Saddam clip on Youtube. It felt ill to watch it. Everyone condemned the taping of the hanging, and called it vile, and yet everyone is watching it.

Wierd thing is, I almost feel bad for him. I always root for the underdog. I know he was a tyrant and and evil bastard, but when he's being mocked and about to die, he's the underdog. I'm such a weak sap and I want to make things better for the poor little victim - it's really ass backwards.

I even felt bad for Ted Bundy at the end of the movie, when he was begging the judge that he did not do it, lying through his teeth.

I'm very glad they both got caught, and punished....it's just in the moment.

Unsettling Settling

It's New Year's day! A day of new beginnings, chances to start over, and encouragement to improve ourselves - and despite the way this entry will sound, I am extremely happy, and excited!

What I am unhappy about, is the way some people repeatedly make the decision to be unhappy.
I had a great day - the kind of joking and jabbing that only a close loving family can sprinkle on each other over shots of Grey Goose at brunch. People are getting pregnant. My unclue just had twins, and the three of us children are childless. Jokes were made, about my brothers' difficulty in forming relationships, and my difficulty in staying in them. Blah blah blah. I liked it more when it was called "NY's Brunch 2006"

Yes, I've had a lot of relationships. And I'm okay with that. I don't give a shit about them failing any more, because they all failed for a reason. My family in Poland, gossips that I change men like gloves. I'm not really sure what that means - I keep my gloves around for a very long time. Panties would make more sense, but gloves? This I believe is my punishment for being free and young while my cousin in Poland got knocked up at 18 out of wedlock and consequently married an abusive man. I welcome this punishment with open arms and mouth over the alternative.

This rant is going no where fast, while the cocktail gets stronger towards the bottom of the glass.

Ok, so she knows where kids come from, and still got knocked up. I speak of this so negatively only because she in no way wanted it. She told me when I was visiting that she was going to try to skip out to another country to have an abortion (Poland is the most Catholic country in the wolrd after all), and if she couldn't, she would kill herself in the ninth month. I contacted all the well-off kids I knew in canada and couldn't get the money together for her. She didn't kill herself. Years later, after the divorce from the abusive ugly disgusting pig of a man, her neighbour, who knew the whole story, got knocked up by the same guy. WTF are you thinking???!

I heard today my uncle might be getting back together with the wench of his wife. I love the triumpth of love. I really do. But this is not love. I'm not sure when the last time was that she's let him have sex with her: meanwhile she's had numerous affairs with men she's met online, while claiming that sex with her husband is too painful, getting knocked up after claiming that she never would/could again even though my uncle has ALWAYS wanted a big family, and threatened to cry beating and take his daughter away if he ever followed through with a divorce. WTF is she thinking? There is more, but I'll save it for Springer.

And now, after all of this, he's thinking about getting back together with her. WTF are you thinking? He's just had twins with a woman that was totally enamoured with him, and he won't get his balls together enough to bring her to Canada and make it work. Instead, he's going to stay in his comfortfuckingable zone and make the decision to never have good sex again, not have the family he's dreamed of, or never be with a woman who sees him as a knight on a ferocious Ukrainian horse again. WTF are you thinking?!?!

I just don't get it. I could go on and on - but it doesn't matter. Maybe like my older bro said today, Psychology would frustrate me, because inevitably PEOPLE DON'T CHANGE.

If that's the case, then I guess I'm lucky. Because I'm bitchy and obstinate and demanding already. I want what I want and I won't settle for less. And no one's gonig to really want me for the long run, unless they really want ME. And maybe that means I'll keep changing gloves, and end up with cold hands, and eleven cats, and a box of wine; but I won't be a wench lover, or an abusive manpig lover, or a "woe is me" wife who has no hope of ever breaking out of her uncomforfcukingable zone.

Now, I have to see if I can put this on a floppy so I can have the hope of posting it at work. Yes, a three and a ahalf inch floppy. How sad is that? It's 2007? And I'm about to go looking for an uninfected floppy? From my undergrad years, no less!