Mission : Hydration

The long weekend is gone and as usual I'm spending the beginning of my work week rehydrating. I love water, but I don't like being at work. I'd be perfectly happy I think if the work week was only about 30 hours - that's about how long it really takes me to do my job - maybe even less.

I am now 28 years old and I still haven't figured out what I want to be when I grow up. My birthday came and went and didn't feel like too much of a birthday. I actually got ditched on my birthday by the couple that Gus and I were supposed to be camping with. Who does that? It's not habitual on her part so I already forgive her, but when I got the call cancelling plans it could have been a highway straight to having an awful day. After sulking for an hour and deciding that Gus and I weren't going to go, we invited some people over to bbq all the food that I bought for camping and Balderdashed late into the night. I forgot how great that game is!

For my birthday, I got beautiful long stemmed roses at work, perfume, a small shopping spree, perfume, a great necklace, yummy lotion and soap set, a mix cd........some of my friends are way too good to me.

Happy Birthday to Me!

Here's what I've learned in 28 years:

1. Don't ever ask him if he thinks your ass is too big
2. Don't ever pluck your eye brows, or trim your hair under the influence (LUI = land scaping under the influence)
3. Do go dancing - all kinds of dancing - even polka
4. Don't settle for a guy that doesn't make you feel like the most important person in the room .
5. Don't say I love you when you don't mean it
6. Say I love you when you mean it
7. If you're eating something and you find mold, stop eating it, it's not worth it........ unless it is I guess
8. Don't take the words of a pharmacist in Mexico as scripture
9. Do watch PIR on a sick day, every single time, even if you have to have puke bucket by you
10. Don't trust a person that always kisses with their eyes open
11. Don't take a bad day out on your dog.....or cat
12. Do realize that your parents, although they're your parents, are just adults with their own hangups and problems and complexes
13. Don't let their complexes become your own.
14. Don't let your dirty tupperware sit around.....forever.....trust me.
15. Wear panties with skirts

Happy Monday Quote

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind.
Dr. Seuss

Wierd Dreams

So I look like crap today - my eyes are read and older looking, my nose is dry from blowing it, and I didn't get any of my beauty sleep. At least the Zicam seesm to have worked and my nose isn't leaking like it was yesterday.

I tossed and turned all night for the second night in a row - that sometimes happens on monday night since I'm worked up from volleyball - but yesterday I was super tired, not feeling well, and I have no idea why - maybe it was Zicam. I remember dreaming a bit, which means I slept, but I also remember seeing almost every hour count up on my alarm clock - one by one.

So in my dream I wake up and I'm trying to get ready for work. I prefer to get ready on my own since I have many girly routines, rather than with a guy in the room - franky they're distracting. So I'm trying to get some privacy but my bf won't leave and ends up staying around way too close proximity, JUST to piss me off. So he won't let me to the point where I'm almost crying so instead I crawl back into bed. I don't wake up for work until 11 something!!!!! I'm freaking out but he doesn't care still - he doesn't get the big deal. I guess he doesn't realize it'st he day after st. Patty's and my boss is just going to think I got wasted and didn't even call in!

I know I'm going to get fired....I call the general work number and get the message "I'm sorry, our phone system is down, IT is working on the issue" omGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!

I go out for some reason at this point, just wandering around, then I decide to call my coworker who does what I do, but I can't figure out how to work my phone. I CAN NEVER USE MY CELL IN DREAMS - DOES THAT HAPPEN TO YOU? Then I realize I am lost and really hungry, and my phone turns into a phone sandwich. I decide I will nibble on it, and it's good - like turkey and mayo and sprouts, then I realize I'd overdone it and I ate all the buttons I need to make it work.

WTF?

I'm soo tired today.

Cinco

I just learned that it's Cinco, no Cinquo as I've been spelling it all along. I hope everyone had a great one. Mine is fuzzy. It started out at Bettylou's house where I finally met the great parents that I hear so many good things about. Gus and I brought too much food and a heavy pinata - I got to break it in a dizzy haze. Feels good to hit things with baseball bats.

Then we headed over to hang out with my good friend miss Robinson - who I don't spend enough time with these days. I have neglected some friendships becauses Gus is so much fun. We got a little lost on the way and ended up in the heart of cinco de mayo in the city - I think we were the only people not flying Mexcian flags. Then Gus took a bunch of money playing poker.

I know I'm a liar and said I'd have pictures on monday but I don't - so I'm posting some pics of my trip to Puerto Vallarta. I didn't take many more because alcohol, and cameras, and hot tubs don't mix.

Jobs That Suck More Than Mine

1. Peep booth mopper
2. Port o Potty cleaner
3. Paris Hilton's assistant
4. Abattoir keeper
5. Parking ticket writer
6. ProTabacco lobbying
7. Telemarketing
8. Funeral/mortuary/taxidermy
9. Auditor
10. Madonna's nanny

things could be much worse....

munday

So what did I learn yet again? That you can't actually make the weekend last longer if you just keep drinking and refuse to go to sleep - but it will be a lot more difficult to get up on the monday morning. But it's hard to remember when you're with your favorite person having fun and you just don't want to let it go.

It was another great weekend with family time. And this reminds me that even though my job is unfullfilling good things happen; love happens. People stay together for 50 years and are still happy together, your brothers will let you be silly and play bad trivial pursuit, your dog will always kiss you.

I will get through the days by remembering that one of these days I'll get to stop paying rent. I'll have my own house, no correct that, home, and I'll plant flowers that I like in the yard, and some kale and tomatoes. I will sit out there on warm summer afternoons when the sun is going down, with a man I would do anything for, and who would do anything for me. We'll have cocktails and a weeping willow, or a cherry tree. If we're really lucky we'll have a hot tub and hammocks. I'll only count calories for myself and I won't worry anymore that one day it will all fall apart and no one will love me. Maybe we'll be able to work less. He won't have a job that makes him travel away from me all the time because I love to sleep with him and wake up with him - unless it's Gus and he plays poker - then I'll deal with it and get more dogs and learn to talk dirty on the phone.

People say that you're not supposed to like your job - that's why it's a job not a hobby. And yes, I can accept that I just won't be fulfilled at work and will have to find all the other things in that I will love and live for those things. But when 40 hours out of 168 are spent at work - shouldn't you do something that you love? Isn't there a better way to spend a whole quarter of your time? I don't know what the right answer is, but I know that people go out on a limb and they get jobs being stand up comedians and doctors. Maybe I don't have the talent or the drive it takes to have a non cookie cutter job.

Lykes Fuzzy Math

So yes, I'm listening to Tom Lykes again - I know, please don't give me crap. I'm turning it off right now and turning on my itunes. Wow! I have four users connected to my iTunes! That makes me feel like a rock star! I just wish I knew what they were listening too.

OK, so topic on today's Lykes peice of crap misogynistic show - pregnancy and trickery. He begins by quoting some study that sayd that a certain percentage and number of pregnancies in the country is "unplanned" according to the child bearer. At the same time that 90% of women claim to use some sort of birth control which is greater than 90% effective. He then goes to say that this makes no sense, and that I being a woman would probably have to ask my bf to help me with the math, but that leaves not enough women who aren't on birth control for them to be accidentally getting pregnant.

So these hateful wenches are obviously lying because they're embarassed to have forced pregnancies on guys. I mean, who doesn't want to be with a guy that's there because he was trapped???! It's so dreamy and romantic......

Now I know he's too much of a hateful son of a fucking bitch to get a woman on there that will say this, so I wouldn't bother calling in....but he clearly doesn't understand these stats. What the effectiveness of birth control is saying is that 90% of the time it is used, it is effective. So if a woman has sex 100 times, there's a chance that she WILL get pregnant. It DOES NOT mean that only 9 out of 10 women on birth control can GET pregnant. So with all the sex that I hope is going on out there, it is not I that need help, it is you, King Shit of Crap Mountain.

I'm ok, really.

I have to start turning off the stream feed at 4pm.

Hory Clap!

I'm turning 28 this month!!! How did this happen? Where is time going???!!!

I am so not ready to give up my hedonistic life style. UGH!!!!!!!! I know, I know - I don't have to. But how long can I keep this up? Oh ya, and the kid thing......because if I want kids then I don't have forever to do so. Do I want kids?