Food Blogs

Lately, I have been very much getting into food blogs - especially those with exquisite photography. I stare at some of them and my mouth waters at work. I'm going to plug my favorite:

http://wellfed.typepad.com/well_fed/2006/02/rosemary_shrimp.html

I was inspired to take a pic of this wine, cinammon and garlic fondue, with chicken and scallops. I love to cook and hope do be going out on a limb with Gus more foten. I hope this makes your mouth water.......

Westboro Baptist Church

This twisted group is going to protest the Vtech funerals because aparently Cho was sent by God to punish America for their outspoken diapproval of the group - claiming that of course it must be so, because God was certainly not sleeping last monday.

I'm ebarassed to be of the same flesh that these people are and disgusted. How much more painful can they make this for the families of victims? They're going to find out I guess. Makes me wish I beleived in God because then I might expect these people to burn in hell.

Back to Black

Amy Winehouse - heck ya.

Quarterbacks

The shooter's creepiness is now coming out and everyone is a monday morning quarterback. Cho was obviously a deeply disturbed kid with social problems. His plays reek of anger and he seems completely emotionally stunted to the level of a 13 year old. Since I am fascinated by murderors and generally evil people I've been reading all the junk out there about him. His roommates told disturbing stories abouthis behaviour and even called the police on him at one point because they were worried he was suicidal.

Now everyone is saying - we all should have known! Why didn't they put the school on lock down! Why was this kid out and walking around when he was so creepy! Why don't schools have more security! How can I send my kids to college now! All the same stuff as we heard after Columbine.

This stuff is going to happen, tragically.

So, yeah - out of all the colleges and schools all over the country, and all the students, how many and how often go on shooting sprees? Not that many. More than before - but your kids are more likely to die in a car accident. This freaky kid was an anomaly in society - an extreme, awful, anomaly.

How are you supposed to lock down a campus? They are huge and how can you control 25K students many of whom are probably still high from having watched South Park and waking and baking? If he had really wanted to find someone to kill, he would have found people to kill whether classes were cancelled or not.

And are we supposed to start locking up or controlling all freaky anomalies in society before they do anything wrong? The only thing he legally did wrong was harassing some girls before the shootings - and I don't think I've met a girl in my life that didn't have some guy or two in her past that had some social issues and didn't get the point very easily. He was treated at a mental health facility and they found him well enough to release - so what can you do? Anything else would be an infrinment of rights. All the warning signs were there, but the same people who will be complaining that this guy was roaming around with nothing done are the same that will be complaining 5 weeks from now about bush tapping phones to find terrorists.

Something's gotta give.

But where are this kid's parents? What's up with THAT?

White Bitch

Last night I was coming back from Volleyball at about 1am - and yes, I am tired today. Upon getting in my car I turned on the parking lights so I could see my stereo, and put in a language speaking tape. Then I made the classic mistake of forgetting to turn on my regular lights.

About five minutes later, I was at an intersection when I heard honking. I looked around and there was a pick up truck 2 lanes to the left of me. Some guy holding a cell phone was signaling for me to roll my window down. I did. Then he said "Turn your lights on, bitch!"

WTF? This person doesn't know me at all? What gives him the need to call me a bitch? My heart jumped a bit and I wondered what I should do. In a really quick decision I decided to ignore him because as recent events have reminded us, you never know who has a gun.

But why is this acceptable? The man (and I use the term loosely) looked to be in his late 20's or early 30's.....and either of middle eastern decsent or hispanic descent. Now if I said "thanks towelhead" or "that's very thoughtful you beaner" he would have probably changed his direction and ran me off the road. So why can he say this to me and think it's OK?

The political correctness in our society is truly twisted and selective.

Let's Not Be Ants

I know we haven't met, but I don't want to be an ant. You know?
I mean, it's like we go through life...
with our antennas bouncing off one other,
continuously on ant autopilot,
with nothing really human required of us.
Stop. Go. Walk here. Drive there.
All action basically for survival.
All communication simply to keep this ant colony buzzing along...
in an efficient, polite manner.
" Here's your change." " Paper or plastic?" "Credit or debit?"
"You want ketchup with that?"
I don't want a straw. I want real human moments.
I want to see you. I want you to see me.
I don't want to give that up. I don't want to be an ant, you know?
Yeah. Yeah, I know.

Susan is leaving the company I work for. She's been here for 11 years and I'm barely even sure that that's her real name. I only know that because I've described her to someone who said "that sounds like Susan blahblah".

Anyway, if you havn't heard my diatribe about the office "how are you? good and you?" here's the short of it - I fucking hate it. Don't ask me if you don't care. If you don't want to hear that I'm pms'ing, drank too much and slept on the floor, my dog puked and i have a wierd rash on my leg then dont' ask. I now answer the question robotically with "super".

I asked Susan how her Labor day weekend was. We had been long "good and you?" friends since we use the same bathroom. Never shared a real word before. Her weekend was awful - her boyfriend of two years told her two days before he left that he was going to Barbados with his "new girlfriend". While at his house her $1200 mountain bike got stolen off her bike rack which she only got so she could go mountain biking with him. She needed to vent.

Thank you for keeping it real, yo.

There don't seem to be too many people that care about some one who they don't really know - but we all have lives outside of work and problems and heart aches and successes and loves. Don't ask if you don't care. If you care and you do ask, then really listen - we all need some one to listen once in a while.

I'll miss you Susan (?).

Cookies and Cartoons

When I wake up in the morning, I generally like something quiet in the back ground while I get ready. I prefer KBCO but since I have no radio or internet in my room I usually settle for TV. In the morning, MTV actually plays vidieos, there the same ones over and over again, but since that's the only place I'll ever hear those songs I can deal with it. Currently, they're totally overplaying the new Timperlake video with the way to beautiful for the world to ever be a fair place Scarlet Johanson - which is way too long a video and not even a decent song but I digress. Instead of hitting "66" this morning, I accidentally hit "6" and the tv took me to a cartoon.

Now cartoons these days, those on Cartoon Network are insane with plots that don't seem to make, they show one quick image after another....no wonder ADD is on the rise! But this was the slow peaceful cartoons that I remember. I think there was a bouncing bunny or something. I listened to the music and stared for a while. It really took me back.

It took me back to the days when waking up in the morning was never that painful, because I didn't need much sleep and morning were just chilling before I mosey'ed on my walk to school.

It took me back to the days when I would have 7 (because the number was lucky) chocolate chip cookies dipped in milk, in my parents' short coffee cups because the shallow walls made them better for dipping, and I didn't worry about the calories or lack of nutrients I was or wasn't digesting.

It took me back to the days when I knew that if I got really sick or depressed and needed to stop getting up every morning, nothing would be wrong, and some one would bring my homework to me - or rather to a time when that worry would never even cross my mind.

Back to a time when there were field trips, and not to Distribution centers, but to cool places like the Zoo, or the Science Center, the Conservatory, the Art Museum........aaaaahhh. And sitting on the back of the bus so that when we hit that big bump on the QEW I'd fly high!

Back to a time when there were all day parties for Valentine's day, Christmas, Halloween.....and we spent all day eating chips and drinking punch and making little heart envelopes or other arts and crafts and getting skool glue all over. And glue sticks!!!!!!!!

Now I know I have to go in to work, there will be no parties, no field trips, no gym class with Red Rover and Capture the flag, no recess with Four Square, no cookies without guilt, no milk because I swear it gives me bad breath, and no getting off school because I faked being sick.

But there will be cooking whatever I want, booze, staying out to late, sex and my bf staying over, trips to Mexico and beyond, road trips, and the loving dog I was never allowed to have.

(God) grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
Change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference....

Rants and Raves

I've been spending a lot of time on craigslist rants and raves - lotta angry people out there - and so much hate. I don't know why people spend their days posting rants about how much they hate mexicans, fat people, gay people, republicans, democrats.....blah blah blah. Some of the posts are so mean and dirty. Then there's the ones that have normal titles but you click on it only to find a pic of a prolapsed recturm or something. What's wrong with you people?

Tom Lykes is one of such people. He spends every day trying to convince the world how completely happy he is. He spent the first 15 mintues of the show today, yelling at me about I have nothing to say (yelling at me!) and how men don't listen to anything that women have to say because all we do is blather gossip and inanity and the only reason that men pretend to listen because they have to do it to get laid. He said to get any idea out of my head that a guy could be listening. He doesn't say this in nice or helpful way. He is clearly saying it to get people riled up.

There is always anger in his voice and his laughs sound forced.

Happy people care about each other, what they feel, what they say, what hurts, what doesn't, what makes their lover smile, what makes their lover cry. He's sad - and yet I don't feel bad for this hate spewing beast.

And Gus, you're the best - I always feel like you're listening and interested - if not, you're the best faker ever!

Gotta go hit refresh on the rants and raves....

Question...

So I have an email constructed to my father about something he did yesterday that hurt my feelings. To send? or not to send? It usually makes me feel better just to write something down, even if no one ever reads it.

So if my dad probably won't change as a result of the email - is there any point in pressing send?

PS. I hate speakerphone. Please don't put me on it or ask me to talk into it.

Weekend Regrets

Yesterday was just one of those days. It should have been much better as I knew I was going to be hanging out with family and Gus. But it started out with a bang and I was upset before brunch. While in MX with Gus's family, I was asked to leave the family picture, in a round about way. Which was fine I guess - I ended up being the one to take it. And hey it's all family...But what do I see in the basement of Gus's parents' house? A family picture with Gus and the ex canoodling and looking too happy for my taste. It really hurt my feelings - I know it's petty but I couldn't help it. Then one thing after another and everything bugged me or hurt me....for the rest of the day.

Unfortunately there was no one but Gus for me to be angry at even though he didn't deserve it. We play vball with this particular ex every week and until yesterday it never bothered me.

Jealousy is one of my ugliest characteristics. It used to be worse and fed by my high school friends. We were extremely competitive and always trying to out do each other. At one point enough was enough and when I seperated from them the jalousy faded. I'm not the kind of girl who needs to be the prettiest in the room, or the one with the best shoes, or smallest ass.

Yesterday it came back full force - fueled by a bad morning and a stiff drink and now I just feel guilty for taking it out on Gus who is too sweeta nd patient with me. In my quest to be a better person I failed miserably. But hey, maybe I just had a really off day - I hear it happens.

Opening Day

Opening day was so much fun. It was a gorgeous day to be off, and a nice tradition to attend. I was in such a good mood that I didn't even mind the complete @ss rape that is pricing at baseball stadiums. I also had a hot dog - my first in years that wasn't of tofu or turkey and it was so good. Can you get into the stadium just to buy a dog? Would that be taking it too far?

Gus and I drank like champs and he tried his hardest to be "that guy" so much that the woman sitting next to him asked her husband to switch seats with her - LOL.

I love days off. Last night I went to sleep embarassingly early - I won't say what time. I had so much energy this morning and was finally rehydrated and ready for life - only to come here and have the life sucked out of me in the first two hours of my boring job.

I'm really bored of my job.

Subdate!

Ok, Subway has now sent me two generic apology letters and 8 coupons for a free 6 inch sub. Thank you Subway!