Bah Fucking Humbug!

Right now I hate Christmas. I went shopping today and got many of the people on my list knocked off - which is mostly family. My little bro is a big mystery but I guess something will pop up before the big day, which in our family, is Christmas Eve - because something always does. But in some cases, I felt I was getting some people a gift just for the sake of giving them something rather than gifting something that they truly need, or would fall in love with. You know me, you know that I'm not a big fan of this type of gift giving, but I guess it still tells someone I thought about them and care about them.

The drivers are out of control. I don't know how many people did stupid things today. I have one motto when it comes to driving - well ok many - but today the one that applies is "If you're going to be a moron, and do something stupid, at least signal before you do it". I don't get why you can't just signal. It's so darn easy. The makers of the automobile, have even put the signal switchie thingie right by the steering wheel where you're holding your hand anyway, if you're not putting on make up, texting, or masturbating while driving. Also, maybe you're retired, and you don't work, and it seems like every day is Sunday; but I assure you, it is not Sunday every day, and I have the 2007 calendar to prove it.

I don't know how many people I saw cheating while driving too and waiting til the last second to get into the busy lane which is the real one they wanted to be in while I'm stuck behind their pathetic ass waiting with their signal for someone to let them in. I almost got t-boned by a person who was at the stop sign way later than me at one of the kajillion of stop lights of the parameter of Park Meadows. At the same intersection I saw a blond Highlands Ranch, $160/month highlights kind of bitch get in the straight going lane and then do a big circle around while we all wait at stop signs and then turn where she wanted to go. They should call it Highlights Ranch by the way.

The walkers are out of control too. People stopping as soon as they walk through the entrance of a store and creating a huge bottle neck behind them are morons. People that cut in line and go to the open register before the next person in the communal line that feeds ALL the registers gets to go are morons.

This is all sooooo in the spirit of the holidays. Unfortunately, I have no talent. I have tried 3 years in a row to make presents for people. However, I have few skills to make anything that would be of any use to anyone, and most people I know have enough crap to move, to clean, to maintain, to sort, to file, to box that I don't think I need to be making anyone clay angels or egg carton caterpillars.

Ugghhh - I could puke right now.

And last of all, I mail some presents every year. With one of the boxes, I went over some kind of weight limitations and had to write a novel for customs. On this form I had to disclaim what was in the box - and fearing that perhaps the contents were illegal to send over the border I panicked and lied. Ugh....you should have seen me, the beads of sweat on my skin after walking to the post office on an unseasonably warm day while carrying a box that was over some kind of weight limit....then rushing to fill out the normal customs form in line fast enough trying to make sure I didn't hold the other procrastinators up....then finding out that I have to fill out some kind of novel that might as well have asked as many questions as one of those questionnaires when you're a "new patient"....I think they asked if I flossed or used practiced safe sex...and I panicked and lied. Now, I'm worried the package won't make it. What if they open it and realize the contents were lied about and wonder about small p0cks???? Oh my.

Ugh.